real talk

The truth is, in order to heal we need to tell our stories and have them witnessed...The story itself becomes a vessel that holds us up, that sustains, that allows us to order our jumbled experiences into meaning.

As I told my stories of fear, awakening, struggle, and transformation and had them received, heard, and validated by other women, I found healing.

I also needed to hear other women's stories in order to see and embrace my own. Sometimes another woman's story becomes a mirror that shows me a self I haven't seen before. When I listen to her tell it, her experience quickens and clarifies my own. Her questions rouse mine. Her conflicts illumine my conflicts. Her resolutions call forth my hope. Her strengths summon my strengths. All of this can happen even when our stories and our lives are very different.

{Sue Monk Kidd}

quoted: Dr. Habib Sadeghi

"...because trying to lose weight by focusing on food is like trying to quit smoking by focusing on cigarettes. How does that make sense? Most weight issues, especially for those who have a significant problem or are considered obese, are emotionally based. Intellectual knowledge about counting calories and exercise has no impact on how we feel about ourselves emotionally. It’s our emotions and subconscious beliefs that drive almost all of our behavior... 4e508db117592ad0226f857684ce26b2

...self-love is misunderstood because people think it’s about buying yourself flowers or treating yourself to the spa once in a while. Self-love is a noun, not a verb. It’s a state of being, not doing. It’s a passive state, not an active one. That’s why 100 bubble baths won’t change how you feel about yourself. We organically acquiesce into self-love only after we reach self-acceptance, which means approving of ourselves exactly as we are with zero judgments. To get to that place, we must first do the work of self-forgiveness. Think about it... can’t love someone if you don’t fully accept them, and you certainly can’t accept them if you hold a grudge against them. That’s why the doing part of self-love, the active work to reach it, actually lies in self-forgiveness; forgiving yourself for not being a size two, the perfect wife/mother, failing at your last diet, not being what your parents wanted you to be, missed opportunities, broken relationships, parenting mistakes, etc. Women are constantly striving to meet the unattainable standards someone else has set for them. When the inevitable failure happens, they turn their judgment inward and subconsciously punish themselves for being less than the ideal. It’s impossible to take loving actions toward yourself when you feel you’ve done so much wrong that you don’t deserve to be happy and at a healthy weight..."

{photo credit: pintrest}